rejectomorph (flying_blind) wrote,
rejectomorph
flying_blind

Being Held Incommunicado by an Evil Computer

I've got the air conditioner going. Sucking up expensive energy as though we owned Iraq. Oh, wait. We do own Iraq. . . for the moment. Of course, I can't be sure that occupied California is going to see any benefit from that oil. That's why I'm always reluctant to use the air conditioner. But Sluggo absolutely insisted that he wouldn't load so much as a single page until I got the room temperature down below 80. With a mortgage on the house, I could probably afford to take it all the way down to 70, and get a full hour online. But I'll just make do with the limited connection, and do the bit of writing from offline. It means I have no time for anoisblue's shower meme, but I've decided to partly engage in it by simply asking myself five questions.

1. What is your favorite moment from history? History provides us with so many fascinating events that I find it difficult to choose just one as my favorite. I've always been fond of the invention of fire, and the consequent availability of light, warmth, cooked food and, eventually, tea. However, for much of the year, I prefer tea iced, so the invention of refrigeration is an important moment for me as well. I'm also rather fond of that moment when Admiral Nelson said "Kiss me, Hardy!" I think it's time for a new movie version of Nelson's life. I see Matt Damon and Ben Affleck in that scene.

2. Why are American talk show hosts so stupid? I'm no expert on American talk shows, but I know what you mean. I find it difficult to decide which of them I dislike most. I'd say that Conan O'Brien is probably the least offensive of those on the big networks. It's because he doesn't have as inflated a view of his own importance, I think. Of course, none of this really addresses the question of their stupidity. I think it's the hot lights in the studios that causes that. The heat fries their brains. Everybody who spends a lot of time under hot lights is stupid. Look at all those news anchors. And the reason Conan O'Brien is the least stupid of them is because such a large percentage of his enormous head is skull, which acts as insulation.

3. If you were trapped on a desert island, which three books would you take with you? Well, now that's just silly. I'm not going to carry three books around with me, just in the event that I end up trapped on a desert island, and if I knew that I was going to be trapped on a desert island, I wouldn't take books, but survival equipment and some sort of communication device with which I could contact someone who would get me off the island. Please don't ask me anymore foolish questions.

4. Why have you never written a novel? This is a bit embarrassing. You see, I have a very short attention span. Novels require a great deal of time and patience and attention to detail. The truth is that it's a wonder I've ever even read a novel. Writing one is out of the question. nik nik nik.

5. What will be the fate of the universe? Now, this is an easy one. The universe will expand indefinitely, its energy will be consumed, (largely by people running air conditioners and surfing the Internet), all matter will degrade, and eventually, it will be nothing but scattered particles floating in a dark and lifeless void. This is called entropy, and nothing can be done about it. Well, either it's that, or the universe is all an illusion and never really existed in the first place. Either way, it's just not my problem. Unless I'm God. If that's the case, uh . . . sorry.

Bonus Question: Has Brad fixed LiveJournal? It looks as though he might have, but I'll believe it when it's been this fast for at least another month.

Oh, the crescent moon is up there in the west with Jupiter nearby. Must go watch.
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