rejectomorph (flying_blind) wrote,
rejectomorph
flying_blind

Reset Eleven, Day Forty

Saturday felt hotter than Friday, and probably was, though I forgot to check the weather report during the day. I did not hear any planes flying over the neighborhood, and did not notice any flying east, but again I forgot to look in that direction. The day was fairly humid, though, and the wind light, and progress has been made on containment of the fires. Weather conditions are likely to deteriorate over the next few days, though. The whole situation grows tedious, even though there's no telling what will happen next. Whatever happens, my opinion is that I cannot recommend being near any sort of holocaust as a way to spend your summer.

Something I forgot to mention last night is that Friday evening was full of motorized racket in this neighborhood. There were what sounded like drag races going on, and much revving of engines, and some asshole had what sounded like a diesel locomotive air horn on his car or truck, and it sounded on several occasions. It was incredibly loud. Not until Saturday night did I find out that the noise was coming from some sort of car and truck rally that was held in the parking lot of the vacant K-mart store, a bit less than half a mile from here. The configuration of fences and buildings here made it impossible for me to determine what direction the noise was coming from. Now I know. I hope this doesn't become a regular feature of the neighborhood.

I still haven't made arrangement for a shopping trip, and I must do tat today sometime. I would like to go Monday, as one store has a couple of items I'd like to get at really good prices that day only. Also I want to get the banking out of the way as soon as possible. I hope I haven't left making the arrangements until too late, but I just didn't seem able to get my act together either Friday or Saturday. Saturday evening I felt so tired that I went in to take a nap, but made the mistake of picking up a book I was almost finished with, and I ended up reading the last four chapters. No its going on five o'clock in the morning and I don't feel sleepy at all, even though I'm as tired as ever. I think I'm probably over-tired.

Crap like that car rally might be the reason Butte-hole County now has the 12th highest rate of new coronavirus infections in the state. It has been climbing in the rankings for several days. Eight of the eleven counties with worse rates are also in the Central Valley, which seems bent on keeping California as unhealthy as possible. Flatter than Kansas and dumber than Alabama, that's us. I'm really too old for this place's shit.




Sunday Verse



The Layers


by Stanley Kunitz


I have walked through many lives,
some of them my own,
and I am not who I was,
though some principle of being
abides, from which I struggle
not to stray.
When I look behind,
as I am compelled to look
before I can gather strength
to proceed on my journey,
I see the milestones dwindling
toward the horizon
and the slow fires trailing
from the abandoned camp-sites,
over which scavenger angels
wheel on heavy wings.
Oh, I have made myself a tribe
out of my true affections,
and my tribe is scattered!
How shall the heart be reconciled
to its feast of losses?
In a rising wind
the manic dust of my friends,
those who fell along the way,
bitterly stings my face.
Yet I turn, I turn,
exulting somewhat,
with my will intact to go
wherever I need to go,
and every stone on the road
precious to me.
In my darkest night,
when the moon was covered
and I roamed through wreckage,
a nimbus-clouded voice
directed me:
"Live in the layers,
not on the litter."
Though I lack the art
to decipher it,
no doubt the next chapter
in my book of transformations
is already written.

I am not done with my changes.
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