rejectomorph (flying_blind) wrote,

Balmy Plus a Few Degrees

Late this afternoon I went to K-mart again, looking for a large spoon with which to open those mangoes I bought yesterday, but they had nothing suitable. I did pick up another muscle shirt, plus a package of ankle socks. A few months ago they had ankle socks in their clearance sale, but at that time I had no idea I would want to try them. I've always worn full-length socks, but recently I've noticed that after a couple of hours wearing them my calves above the sock line start to swell.

This entirely new (to me) phenomenon is probably indicative of some dire malady like high blood pressure or pellagra (whatever that is,) but it suddenly dawned on me that I could treat this probably fatal illness with shorter socks. The socks were no longer cheap, but this week they were a dollar off, and I had that five dollars of K-mart bonus cash, so I got them cheapish, plus it was a bonus pack with one extra pair in it. If they don't work out and I still die of swollen calves at least the plan will have failed for less money out of my pocket. That will pay for a couple more beers at my funeral party.

After bringing my purchases home I'd planned to go out again and check at least one more store for spoons, but I dawdled about (give me a break, my calves are swollen) until it was too late. But I did get to enjoy a placid (aside from freeway noise) hour sitting in the balmy but shaded backyard listening to the mockingbird, and what sounded like three adolescent skateboarders who briefly paused along the trail and gossiped about girls they like while one of their number took a leak on the other side of my fence. There is so much drama and excitement in the mini-metropolis!

But all good things must come to an end, and night fell and I returned to my still-toasty apartment and surfed the web while sitting in the draft generated by the air conditioner. On the whole it was a fairly decent, if rather too warm and more wasted than not, day, and I feel so sexy and grown-up in my slinky tank top! And I've noticed that the crepey skin and cellulite lumps around my neck, newly exposed by my bold change of wardrobe, are starting to get a slight tan, thanks also to my more outdoorsy new lifestyle. Soon I could have skin cancer, just like an adult! It's going to have to hurry up, though, if it wants to get me before the heart attack that all that cholesterol-rich whipped cream I've been devouring lately promises to give me.

Since I've already done the shopping I have no definite plans for tomorrow. Chico has no bus service on Sunday, so anything I do will be nearby. If it isn't too hot I'll probably make another stab at buying a spoon for those mangoes, first at CVS and then, if needed, at Walgreen's. I don't think the pricey-looking kitchen store east of the plaza is open on Sundays, but I might check the web to see if it is. If I don't get a spoon tomorrow I think I'll just try opening the damned mangoes with a dessert spoon, though I'm sure that utensil's comparatively small size will make the job pretty messy. What the hell, I've dealt with messes before. What the hell, I've dealt with my brain all my life!

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