rejectomorph (flying_blind) wrote,

Take No Substitutes

It has grown cold now that the storm front has passed through. I turned up the thermostat to get some of the chill out of the room. This room seems colder at any given temperature than my house did. Probably the hard surfaced floors and the lack of furniture, and the absence of cats. It's going to be colder on the ridge, and it's going to be cold both here and there for the foreseeable future, but no rain is predicted until a week from next Saturday. It looks like the drought could be back on.

This afternoon I went to Safeway, but it turned out to be a big mistake to go to the only market on town that was open on Christmas Day. I've never seen the place so crowded. It took forever to get through it, and in the end I didn't get several things I'd wanted. They were either sold out, or so well hidden that I couldn't find them. It's going to take forever to learn where stuff is in the stores here.

Last night was a pretty bad night. A few nights ago I had a toothache in the broken bicuspid I've been trying to ignore for several months. The next couple of days it didn't bother me, but last night it stated hurting again. It kept getting worse, and the pain kept spreading until it was affecting half of the left side of my face. I began to worry that the tooth might be getting abscessed, and the consequent anxiety aggravated the pain.

Eventually I either fell asleep or passed out because the pain was so intense, but when I woke up this morning it only hurt if I bit down on something. I'm thinking I'll eat something very soft tonight. Probably grits, since I'm getting tired of ramen. But I really need to see a dentist— another thing to add to my ever-growing list of onerous tasks. In the meantime I bought both aspirin and ibuprofen at Safeway.

The silence in this apartment is not the good kind, so to drive it away tonight I played some music videos. They don't sound very good on this laptop's tiny speakers. It sounds a lot like a transistor radio from the 1950s. If I were in a better mood I might enjoy a nostalgia rush from that, but under the circumstances it's just another one of the constant barrage of annoyances and irritations that come with being horribly displaced.

Tomorrow I might get a chance to go to another store, so I can buy the package of pink beans I couldn't find at Safeway and the salt that I forgot to buy yet again. I'd really like to get to the Goodwill store, where they might have some pieces of the furniture I need so badly. I have nothing to sit on but one chair (I have two chairs but the other is serving as a night stand) and the bed, which has a tendency to roll away across the hard floor on its noisy little wheels when I sit on it. I hate the idea of buying new furniture because it would seem like a commitment to this place, and I really don't want to be committed to it. The chilly silence here is no substitute for serenity.

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