rejectomorph (flying_blind) wrote,

Cut Off

The Internets went away from my house entirely for a few hours last night. AT&T put in anew box on its pole sometime ago, replacing one that squirrels had broken into and used as nut storage, but that didn't fix the problem as the squirrels had also munched the insulation off of the cable that leads from the box on the pole to my house. The cable will have to be replaced before I get reliable Internets again, and I have no idea when that's going to happen.

Another thing I don't know is why the squirrels munch the cable insulation. What flavor is the insulation? Is it made of walnuts? Do they get a high from it? Do they just reflexively chew on it? Does the government secretly bombard the squirrels with rays that give them an impulse to chew insulation? Should the squirrels wear tinfoil hats to protect themselves (and my Internets) from this government plot?

Could it be that the Squirrels belong to a secret terrorist group that wants to destroy the Internets? Are they motivated by a fanatical rodent religion? Or are they Communists bent on destroying Our Way of Life? Or are squirrels Internet ready and able plug into it by touching the wire under the insulation? Are the squirrels stealing my bandwidth to watch porn? Or is it something personal? Are they getting even with me because I don't leave all the walnuts that grow on my tree for them?

All these things are a mystery to me. All I know for sure is that my Internets went away for several hours last night, and as a consequence I didn't get a journal entry posted, and the squirrels are to blame. But they are so darn cute! I'll probably let them get away with it.

I just hope AT&T gets that cable replaced before the rainy season begins. And maybe use an insulation that squirrels don't like to munch on.

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