rejectomorph (flying_blind) wrote,
rejectomorph
flying_blind

Displaced

Well, Farcebook refused to let me post this. It's probably too long for their weak posting boxes. Fortunately, I wrote it here (again because Farcebook's weak "Say something about this" comment box is a huge pain in the ass to use) so it's all ready to go and I might as well post it to LJ, even though it's really only of Farcebook quality. It was inspired by This piece at Snopes.com debunking a recently popular meme about things that were claimed to be veal crates.

Once again, the liberal web site Snopes.com fails to tell the whole truth. While it is true that these crates are not veal crates, but crates for dairy calves, what they don't tell us is that the crates themselves are part of a much larger conspiracy. They are in fact the byproduct of chemtrails.

Chemtrails are used to alter the weather. People in league with the Illuminati spread chemtrails to gradually warm the earth, creating the illusion that people are gradually warming the earth (the so-called "global warming" phenomenon.) After they have done their work in the sky, the chemicals in the chemtrails spontaneously form themselves into these crates, which then fall to earth with the artificially created and heated rain.

A company which is owned by George Soros then sends men around to gather the crates. The emanations from the crates are so dangerous that the collectors must wear not only tinfoil hats, but entire suits made of tinfoil. (Soros does not want the collectors to be injured because they are all either Muslim terrorists or Illegal Mexicans, the only people he ever hires, and he plans to use them in his takeover of America.) The crates are then sold to dairy farmers to house newborn calves. Soros uses half the money from these sales to finance more chemtrails, and gives the other half to Hussain Obama and Hillary Clinton.

All these evils will be brought to an end by Donald Trump when he becomes President. He is especially determined to destroy this evil crate industry, as he was himself mistaken for a newborn dairy cow when he was an infant, and was imprisoned in one of these crates for ten weeks, despite having been born with a fully-formed mind and the ability to speak twelve languages. Though infant Donald explained to his captors that he was not a dairy calf but a human child, it was to no avail. Of course it was to no avail! George Soros wanted to destroy him, and the dairy farmers were his agents! Happily, he was rescued from his crate by young Cliven Bundy, even then a True Patriot.

But we must all do our parts to help Donald Trump end these abominations. Do not use dairy products! Remember, milk is a not only a virulent poison (it was used to murder Justice Antonin Scalia!) but can also be used to create evil, artificial life forms (Donald Trump's sworn enemy, Rafael "Ted" Cruz, is made entirely of cheese and fluoride!) Every time you drink milk, it contaminates your precious bodily fluids. Cows are actually space aliens brought to Earth by the Illuminati! Wake Up, America! You have nothing to lose but your lactose-induced flatulence!

Trump 2016! #ButterIsDeliciousMurder
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