||[Mar. 30th, 2014|06:30 pm]
Sunshine has returned, but has not dominated the day. Many birds gathered to chirp greetings. The sprouting grass, mowed last week, has already grown shaggy. Rain-battered camellias, turning brown, lie heaped about the feet of the bushes. The deep green moss on the fruitless mulberry tree is dense, but the tree itself appears to be struggling to put out a few new twigs dressed with a few pale leaves. It might not bring much shade this summer, and I doubt it will survive much longer. |
The lilac bushes in the back yard are faring slightly better, but they, too, seem to be nearing the end of their lives. This spring is fulled of mixed signals. The exotic garden plants seem old, their lushness spent, but the oaks and pines flourish. They are the natives, of course, so they should, even in drought years, but the general decline around them is sad. I can't tell if I've grown weary of the place, or have just grown weary. Maybe it's both. I keep thinking I'd like to go some other place, but have I no idea where, and I doubt that I have the energy in any case.
So I sit and watch the landscape and the drifting clouds, and listen to the birds and the frogs, and sniff the crisp air scented with wet grass and pine. Tomorrow it will rain again, and I'll be relieved from thinking about change for another day. After all, nothing can be done in the rain.
[Where do words come from?]
by Vénus Khoury-Ghata
Where do words come from?
from what rubbing of sounds are they born
on what flint do they light their wicks
what winds brought them into our mouths
Their past is the rustling of stifled silences
the trumpeting of molten elements
the grunting of stagnant waters
they grip each other with a cry
expand into lamentations
become mist on the windows of dead houses
crystallize into chips of grief on dead lips
attach themselves to a fallen star
dig their hole in nothingness
breathe out strayed souls
Words are rocky tears
the keys to the first doors
they grumble in caverns
lend their ruckus to storms
their silence to bread that's ovened alive
–translated by Marilyn Hacker
"...bread that's ovened alive." Wow.
I kind of relate about wanting to move but not knowing to where. I get that urge often. Seattle is nice, but it doesn't feel like home in any permanent sense.
Did you get the rain today?
This place has a nice landscape, but I've never developed any strong attachment to the town. I get nostalgic about parts of Los Angeles, but I haven't been there in decades, and they have changed. They wouldn't be what I remember. It makes me feel vaguely homeless, even though I have a house to live in.
So far today we've had only sprinkles, but the sky is very dark and rain could start pouring at any time. It's supposed to get much colder tonight, and the snow level might even drop to my elevation. Snow on the ground for April Fool's Day would be appropriate.